Musician types are known for being hyper-sensitive, neurotic, prima donna. Of course, I would never put myself in that category. But if I'm honest, what goes on inside my head some days would certainly qualify me. I usually keep a tight lid on all that mess!
I just realized today, that this whole thing starts in first grade. First Grade! I was sorting through my son's school papers from last year and saw a Comparison Worksheet. There it was in black and white. We learn this skill in first grade and it never stops does it? Less than, greater than or equal to:
< > or =
Why do I want to be greater than? Why do I most often feel less than? What is true about me? In a moment of vulnerability Don Moen, a pioneer of modern worship, expressed his own insecurities as a worship leader. It was surprising, a little sad and yet so beautiful. I heard him make this statement: God will not anoint who you want to be, He anoints who you are. And then he said this: You.....are enough.
Who am I to judge myself as less than? How does that make my creator feel? My self-measurement is not inspiring a grateful heart or delight in His design. Now, I see a new operator on the comparison sheet of my giftedness. No, it's not greater than. It's not equal to. But it's not less than either. Its ENOUGH.